(Note to reader: Littlest has a copy of THREE different ‘The Grunt and the Grouch’ books to give away to ONE lucky reader and all details can be found at the end of this post)

The Grunt and The Grouch are two of the most disgusting and badly-behaved trolls in the world – and the most fun! They keep bogies and ear wax in jars, they never ever have a bath, and they’re always frightening old ladies…even if they don’t mean to!

This brand-new series of three-in-one storybooks will bring out the troll in all girls and boys! Join The Grunt and The Grouch as they disperse the queue at the cinema by playing the windy pop game, get into hot water at school for teaching the children some rude songs, and find themselves tidying up their lovely, grimy house when Auntie comes to stay.

I read this book with Littlest and whilst she was laughing out loud I was feeling rather queasy. I honestly don’t think that I’ll ever look at cinema pick ‘n’ mix in the same way!  Littlest has absolutely loved the 2 chapter books (‘Pick ‘n’ Mix’ and ‘Beastly Feast!’) and the single picture book that she has read. I love that the character development can be taken from a picture book level into independent chapter book reading. This is such a good tool to help your child feel grown up as she/he takes those first steps into independent reading. Each chapter book contains 3 “Trollific” (see what they did there? Love it!) stories.

The Grunt and the Grouch as characters are rather genius. They appeal to children because they are so perfectly disgusting and the trolls are so utterly lovable. Littlest has passed her chapter books onto Middlest. She thinks that the books are suitably disgusting for even a-little-bit-more-grown-up-than-her boys and girls!

I think these books are little gems that really deserve and need to be discovered.

‘The Grunt and the Grouch picture book can be bought here and ‘Pick ‘n’ Mix (The Grunt and the Grouch)’ can be bought here and ‘Beastly Feast (The Grunt and the Grouch)’ can be bought here.

And now over to Littlest, as she interviews Tracey Corderoy:

What’s your favourite pick ‘n’ mix sweet? I like all sorts of pick ‘n’ mix but I’m especially fond of strawberry pencils with sherbet inside because they can last quite a long time if you suck instead of chew! I also like chocolate-covered raisins very much and sometimes I choose those pink shrimp things. The ones that look a bit like prawns, only nicer!

Do you have any pets? I have a dog, 2 kittens and 2 lost cats. We have lots of pets and they all live in our little cottage with us!

We have a big, big dog called Dylan who likes to sit on laps and eat fairy cakes, a black cat called Bramble, two guinea pigs called Amber and Coco, a mini-lop eared rabbit called Binky (who lives in our spare room with the guineas!) and we’ve just got a little boy kitten called Mog. He has a spotty tummy and climbs up curtains and people.

Does Aunt Gretal get her handbag back? Yes she does! But first she makes Grunty and Grouchy clean the house again! Poor trolls – she won’t let them get away with anything will she?

Do you wear lipstick? I do wear lipstick, though not as much as Great-Aunt Gretal! And I sometimes don’t know why I bother because every time I have a cup of tea it comes off all round the top of the mug. Yuck!

When you were little did you want to be a writer? Well, I always loved reading and I always loved writing but when I was very little I wanted to be a teacher. Then, when I was bigger I was a teacher before I was a mummy. Now there’s nothing I love more than being at home with my family and the pets, writing and writing all day long…

I think you’ll have your ears pierced, but my mummy says that not all adults do. Do you? Your mummy is right when she says that not all adults have their ears pierced but actually Littlest, you’ve guessed right too because I do!

Do you like The Grunt or The Grouch best? Oh, the hardest question of the lot! Um … er – see the thing is, Grunty and Grouchy are so very different although they’re both revolting! Grunty, as you know, is grumpy and thumpy and Grouchy is small and cheery. I love the way that Grunty says what he thinks and I love the way that Grouchy always looks on the bright side (even if things are grim!). I have to say I like them both the same though I wouldn’t want either at my party, would you? Even if they promised to be good…

I have 3 books written by you. Are there lots more that my mummy can buy for me? Well, there’s another troll book coming out next year (probably called Loop-the-Loop!) so you could look out for that. Grunty and Grouchy get up to all sorts – just wait!

As well as more picture books, I have a new series of stories being published in 2011 and 2012, which I’m writing at the moment. If you visit my website from time to time, you’ll find out about all my new books. There are troll activity sheets on there too for you to download and have fun with – colouring sheets and spot-the-difference – that sort of thing.

Littlest has a copy of ‘The Grunt and the Grouch’ (picture book), ‘Beastly Feast! (The Grunt and the Grouch)‘ and ‘Pick ‘n’ Mix (The Grunt and the Grouch)‘ to give away to ONE very lucky reader! All you have to do is leave a ‘please pick me’ comment by 3pm (GMT) September 4, then she’ll pop all names in a mug and ask her borther to select a winner. This competition is open to all.

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About Littlest: Littlest is only just 7 and she likes to read. She has a rather impressive collection of signed books and, at the moment, she’s thinking that she’ll either be a fashion designer or a writer when she’s much much older. She plans to NEVER leave home.

About Tracey Corderoy: Tracey Corderoy was born in South Wales and now lives in Gloucestershire with her husband, two daughters and a menagerie of animals. She is a trained teacher and now implements specialist literacy programmes in schools.

My print and video interviews with Kristina Chetcuti are now on the Times of Malta website (and the article is in print today). The video was shot in the sunshine on a busy road right next to my great-grandparents’ house, a house called ‘Elena’.

You can read and watch it all here.

(And for anyone coming to my site for the first time today – a big HELLO to you!)

‘Horrid Henry Rocks’ will be published on 2 September but I have TWO COPIES to give away this week and all details can be found at the end of this post.

I don’t think that there are many parents who haven’t heard of Horrid Henry and this new book will definitely not disappoint any Horrid Henry fans.

Within  ‘Horrid Henry Rocks’ there are four brand new stories to read. Horrid Henry’s Invasion, where Horrid Henry and Perfect Peter keep invading each other’s rooms. Moody Margaret’s Sleepover which sees Moody Margaret inviting all the members of the Secret Club for a sleepover, with catastrophic results. Horrid Henry’s Autobiography, where Miss Battle-Axe’s class all have to write their autobiographies, the best to be published in the local paper. And, finally, Horrid Henry Rocks which tells how Horrid Henry wants to go to the Killerboy Rats concert while his family want to go to the Daffy and her Dancing Daisies concert.

‘Horrid Henry Rocks’ will be launched at the Edinburgh festival next weekend and Francesca Simon will then be undertaking a signing tour:

1 September – Waterstone’s Kensington.

2 September – Seven Stories in Newcastle.

3 September – Waterstone’s Manchester Deansgate.

4 September – AM Pritchards, Formby and PM Waterstone’s Liverpool One.

5 September – Waterstone’s Milton Keynes.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve got a bit of a soft spot for Horrid Henry and his adventures have provided all three of my children with laughs and genuine enjoyment.  Francesca Simon’s storytelling is spot on and children really do love reading  her books. (Horrid Henry has been named the second most popular children’s character in a poll undertaken by Book Trust – only losing the top spot to Harry Potter!) Middlest has all of the Horrid Henry books (many passed down from Eldest) and Littlest is just starting to steal them from her brothers explore them. I loved that we could experience this story book together.

‘Horrid Henry Rocks’ is a must read, it’s really as simple as that.

You can pre-order ‘Horrid Henry Rocks’ here.

Thanks to Orion, I have TWO COPIES of the brand new ‘Horrid Henry Rocks’ to give away! All you have to do is leave a ‘please pick me’ comment by 3pm (GMT) August 26, then I’ll pop all names in a mug and ask a small child to select TWO winners. This competition is open to all.

(Note to reader: I’ve TWO COPIES of ‘The Happy Home for Broken Hearts’ to give away and all details can be found at the end of this post)

Ellie Woods spends her days immersed in the escapist pages of the romantic novels she lovingly edits. But her reality is somewhat less rose-tinted. Once upon a time, Ellie had her ‘happily ever after’ moment when she married her beloved Nick, but fifteen years later her husband’s tragic death leaves her alone with their soon-to-become-a-teenager son, faced with a mountain of debt, and on the verge of losing the family home.

On the brink of bankruptcy Ellie finally succumbs to her sister’s well-meant bullying and decides to rent out some rooms. And all too soon the indomitable Allegra with her love for all things Lavender, Sabine on secondment from Berlin and estranged from her two-timing husband, and unreconstructed lads’ mag aficionado Matt enter her ordered but fragile existence – each with their own messy life in tow…

Out today (Happy Publication Day!), ‘The Happy Home for Broken Hearts’ is an ideal summer read, one that manages to find that perfect balance between humour and heart. I loved the characterisation, I loved the emotional depth and poignancy, I loved the humour and I especially loved the nods to the publishing world. This emotionally satisfying novel is really very ace and a perfect anecdote to a wet summer day.

It’s no secret, bestselling author Rowan Coleman is a super talented writer and I absolutely, wholeheartedly and utterly recommend ‘The Happy Home for Broken Hearts’ to you.

You can buy ‘The Happy Home for Broken Hearts’ here.

Where did you find your inspiration for ‘The Happy Home for Broken Hearts’? I started with the character – Ellen Woods, who appeared in a short story I wrote for a women’s magazine. I thought she was interesting, so I took her out of that story and put her into another situation. My inspiration concerning the plot really came out of the blue, I was writing another book entirely when I realised something quite fundamental about Ellen that changed the direction of the book.

Do you believe in ‘happily ever after’? I want to – but its very rare that one of my  books will end that way, nice and neatly with all the ends tied up. I tried to do that with ‘The Accidental Family’ – for the readers who care so much about the characters, more than for me. But since then I’ve had tons of people asking me what happens next and will be there be another book – so although I long for a happy ending, I’m always interested in what happens to Cinderella next – hence my second novel After Ever After.

Do you plan out the entire novel before you start writing? I do loosely – I always say its easy to get lost if you don’t have a road map, but the most fun about writing is when its really flying and you take a turn you didn’t expect – which is what happened with ‘The Happy Home for Broken Hearts’.

How long does a first draft of a novel take you to write? Between three and five months – which might not seem like a long time but I spend a long time thinking about the characters, which I count as work!

This is your eighth novel. Do you have an idea for your ninth or even your tenth? And do you ever share early drafts of your writing or is your agent the first person to read it? I’m writing my ninth at the moment, and I had the idea for it about two years ago. I have an idea what I want to write about for my tenth, and also an idea about a completely new style of book which I’d probably write under another name. I don’t let ANYONE read it until I give it to my agent and editor.

Do you have any top tips on self-editing your work? I’d say don’t get obsessed with getting one bit right before you move onto the next. Quite often I can’t fix the start of a book until I’ve written the end, so no matter how much you might want to perfect one section, write the whole book – then edit.

If you weren’t a (fabulous) writer, what would you like to be (when you grow up)? I would like to be an opera singer – or the other night I dreamt I was a singer in a Parisienne Jazz band. Of course the fact I can’t sing is a BIT of a drawback.

And, just in case it has changed since I last asked, do you in any way know Simon Cowell? I do NOT know Simon Cowell BUT I did have a burger at the next table along from David Hasslehoff (sp?) who does know Si – so we’re practically besties!

I have TWO COPIES of ‘The Happy Home for Broken Hearts’ to give away! All you have to do is leave a ‘please pick me’ comment by 3pm (GMT) August 24, then I’ll pop all names in a mug and ask a small child to select TWO winners. This competition is open to all.

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About the author: Rowan Coleman worked in bookselling and publishing for seven years before winning Company Magazine Young Writer of the Year in 2001. Her first novel GROWING UP TWICE was published in 2002 and was a WHS Fresh Talent winner. Since then Rowan has written eight novels for women including THE ACCIDENTAL MOTHER, THE BABY GROUP, and THE ACCIDENTAL WIFE. Rowan has also written the RUBY PARKER series for girls, about thirteen year old child star Ruby Parker. Recently Rowan has published the first novel in a paranormal trilogy NEARLY DEPARTED under the name Rook Hastings. She now lives in Hertfordshire with her family. You can visit Rowan at her website, on Twitter and on Facebook.

Meet Harriet Houdini, a young rabbit with lots of attitude!

After winning the village pet show, Harriet is whisked into the world of show business and finds herself competing in a talent show. If she wins, she’ll be a national star but there are other pets with their eye on first place. Can Harriet compete with an opera singing Poodle? And who is the mysterious man who offers to buy her?

From daring backflips to thrilling escape attempts Harriet really is a Stunt Bunny extraordinaire!

Littlest met Tamsyn Murray at my launch in London, back in May. I’d worried about how Littlest would cope with the late night and being amongst strangers, but I need not have worried. Part way through the evening I happened to glance over at Tamsyn showing Littlest how to hop like a bunny! They talked books and Littlest came home clutching her very own especially-signed copy of  ‘Stunt Bunny: Showbiz Sensation’. The very next day, Littlest read her book, then went to Tamsyn Murray’s website and printed out the template for a Stunt Bunny puppet. Littlest then went on to make all the characters and performed her very own puppet show (for several hours!).

Taking time to interact with small readers, making them excited about characters and about books is something that not all writers do. How many of us remember that first book we connected with as a child? The writers who can go that ‘extra’ little bit create fans who will remember their books and their characters forever. I love that this is sometimes possible and I am grateful to any writer who takes time to encourage my children to love books. Littlest thinks ‘Stunt Bunny: Showbiz Sensation’ is brilliant! She has shown it to all of her friends and is thrilled that Tamsyn agreed to answer her (somewhat random) questions. (Thank you Tamsyn!)

Littlest interviews Tamsyn Murray:

Do you have a bunny rabbit called Harriet? No, Harriet Houdini is a made up name. I have five rabbits. They are called Ronnie and Roxie,  Snoop and Dre and Dizzy. Ronnie and Roxie are celebrity bunnies because I wrote the book about the things they did. Dre is a quiet boy and Snoop is very friendly. Dizzy is super speedy when she hops around her hutch.

Why is Harriet a bunny rabbit and not a puppy? Do you like bunny rabbits more than puppies? Harriet is a bunny because Roxie escaped in the garden one day and made me chase her round to catch her, which gave me the idea for Stunt Bunny. I like puppies too and have one called Lillie. She doesn’t do backflips but she’s very cute.

Can you do backflips? No, but I can lick my own elbow and I have some sparkly bunny ears.

Did you write stories when you were little? The first story I remember writing was about a girl called Natasha and her pet monkey. I think it was quite a good story but I can’t remember much about it. I think it had a happy ending, though.

I loved making a Stunt Bunny puppet and a Lily one, but the Lily one  isn’t very good. Will there be a Lily puppet on your Internet soon so I can print it out and make one? Wow, you made your own Lily puppet? That’s amazing! I’ll definitely have to see if we can get a cut out Lily puppet made just for you.

I am happy that you are writing another Stunt Bunny book and have asked my mummy to buy it for me. Will you remember to tell her when it comes out? I am happy that you are happy and of course I’ll remind your mummy.It will be in the shops next February and I’m hoping there will be more fun things to do on my website, like Bunny Trump cards and Harriet puppets.

I like red and pink. What colours do you like? I think I like every single colour there is but my favourites are blue and silver. I have a bracelet made of blue and silver beads.  It has a silver bunny and a puppy on it.

Do you know the Tooth Fairy? I wrote her a letter and she didn’t come and get it. I do know the Tooth Fairy – her name is Ellie and she’s a good friend of mine. I’m sorry to hear she didn’t come to get your letter. Maybe she was at Tooth Fairy Training college, learning how to care for children’s teeth? I’ll ask her next time I see her.

You can buy ‘Showbiz Sensation: Showbiz Superstar’ here.

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About Littlest: Littlest is only just 7 and she likes to read. She has a rather impressive collection of signed books and, at the moment, she’s thinking that she’ll either be a fashion designer or a writer when she’s much much older. She plans to NEVER leave home.

About Tamsyn Murray: Tamsyn Murray spent her childhood moving around a lot, from Truro in Cornwall to a village called Norham in Northumberland (which is probably as far from Cornwall as it’s possible to get and still be in England) and then on to the Lake District. At eighteen she left home to go to university in London and has been a Londoner ever since. When she’s not working or writing, she can be found singing and dancing with her local amateur dramatics society. She is currently thirty-six and a half years old and married to the loveliest man in the world. She has one daughter.

Lauren has always known she was adopted but when a little research turns up the possibility that she was snatched from an American family as a baby, suddenly Lauren’s life seems like a sham.

How can she find her biological parents? And are her adoptive parents really responsible for kidnapping her? She manages to wangle a trip across the Atlantic where she runs away to try and find the truth. But the circumstances of her disappearance are murky and Lauren’s kidnappers are still at large and willing to do anything to keep her silent…

I really don’t know what’s going on with me at the moment, first I cry at Up, then at Toy Story 3 and now at this book, Girl, Missing. I’m an emotional wreck!

I’m writing at the moment, which means that I can’t read the same genre that I write (and that makes perfect sense to me!). Having rushed through the Sookie Stackhouse collection (I have one left to read but it’s only available in hardback), I decided to dip into teen fiction.

I thought Girl, Missing was ace, really really ace.

The way it works with me is that I like to read a book and then I like to read the Amazon reviews that people have written. I also like that every single time some of them make me cross (please remind me of this next time I let an Amazon review of one of my books reduce me to tears). For this book I particularly enjoyed reading reviews by adults who had clearly missed the point that the target audience should always be considered when writing a review. Yes, some of the jumps as to how Lauren actually gets to go to America will be questioned by an adult audience and yes, one reviewer may be right to consider Lauren to be selfish and immature, but that’s simply because the characterisation is spot on.

Girl, Missing is the story of an angry and confused young girl, desperate to find out her true identity. Lauren and Jam are characters that young teens will relate to and will understand. They are teenagers, wanting to be adults but not quite ready to deal with the emotional responsibilities that come with age. This novel is clearly written by someone who understands the teenage psyche.

Aimed at a young teen audience (11-13) this is a story that manages to be current and not at all patronising. With twists and tension, this thriller has so much to offer both male and female readers. I particularly liked the romance aspect, feeling that it’s the perfect level for the target audience.

In my opinion, the teen references are spot-on and the writing is sharp. I liked that sensitive issues were tackled, I liked that ‘the grass isn’t always greener’, I liked that ‘happily ever afters’ aren’t instant and I particularly liked that the teen characters threw proper teen sulks and weren’t at all painted as being Hollywood perfection. Eldest is racing through it now, he’s nearly thirteen and really ‘gets’ it.

An impressive debut and I’m not at all surprised that this has won numerous awards.  If you or your young teen hasn’t already read Girl, Missing then I fully recommend it to you. I look forward to exploring more of Sophie McKenzie’s worlds.

(You can buy Girl, Missing here)

Have you ever had a secret? One so important that it feels as if it will tear you in two?

Stephen’s got one. He’s also got a great job, beautiful wife and an adorable son. Outwardly his life seems perfect but it means nothing without Alice.

Read Without Alice and meet a man who you will love to hate until you learn to love him.

I met DJ Kirkby online many years ago now and we ‘clicked’. Her blog made me smile and her enthusiasm was (and still is) infectious. I’ve since met her in real life and I’m proud that she’s my friend and I’m also proud of this, her debut novel.

Governed by duty, lost without love, Without Alice is a story that will touch many hearts. DJ Kirkby offers a truly insightful narrative, one that is skilfully controlled by her delicate hand.

You can but Without Alice direct from Punked Books.

Asking DJ Kirkby:

You’re having two virtual book tours. Can you explain how the publication is happening? Well other than the fact that I’m having two blog tours because I know one is going to be so much fun that I’ll want to do it again; I’m also having two blog tours because Without Alice is having two publication dates. The first on July 31^st is when Without Alice become available exclusively from the Punked Books website and the second on the 4^th October is when it will go on general release and be available everywhere.

How did you find your publisher and how did you feel when they said that they’d love to publish Without Alice? I met my publisher on facebook!  Hence I now think facebook is one of the greatest social networking sites ever.  When he offered me a contract to publish Without Alice I was thrilled and instinctively wanted to laugh and say “What?  Really?” out of sheer delight but realised in time that would definitely sound all kinds of wrong.  I can’t really remember what I actually did say in response (other than ‘yes’) but it definitely wouldn’t have come out anywhere near as hysterically enthusiastic as I felt inside.

Where did you get your inspiration to write this novel? Because I am autistic, I am fascinated by all aspects of communication and how easily something can be communicated badly or misinterpreted.  I was keen to play around with the foibles of communication, to see what good and bad could come from it which also helps me to interpret the behaviours of non autistic people.  Eventually all this testing out of the different aspects and methods of communication worked itself into a novel.

How long did Without Alice take to write? It took me about two years of messing around and playing at writing to get the first draft written by March 2008, and the final professional edit was completed in September 2009.

Writers often find redrafting and self-editing difficult. Can you offer any words of wisdom? If a publisher offers to publish your book without editorial support – don’t sign the contract! I made this mistake with my memoir From Zaftig to Aspie and am now very embarrassed by it because it wasn’t edited properly.  I learnt my lesson and paid to have Without Alice edited by BubbleCow which gave me the confidence to submit it to Punked Books.  Kevin Mahoney still did his own edit of Without Alice after Punked Books had offered to publish it. I was very impressed with the one major edit he asked for and feel that Without Alice is a much better novel because of it.  I believe that  having my novel professionally edited enhanced the work I’d already done.

Who do you feel would be your ideal reader? My ideal reader is any woman or man who has experienced the challenges that arise from miscommunication, those ‘how did I get myself into this mess and how do I get myself out of it?’ moments. Hah, you see what I did there?  My novel is ideal for any adult reader, yay! G’wan everyone, read it and let me know what you thought of Without Alice! Seriously, do let me know what you thought of it.  There’s a facebook page dedicated to Without Alice. Please join in the discussions, the more the merrier.

What do you plan to write next?
I am currently writing two novels. The Plump WAG’s Club – A year in the life of four fat forty-something friends and A Dappled Life – A young man struggling to leave his past where it belongs.

Can you offer any tips for people wanting to be published? 1. Write a novel.

2.  Pay to have it professionally edited, no matter what your day job is.

3. Believe in yourself as an author!

I’m autistic, dyslexic and dyspraxic, and while none of these have kept me from living my dream of writing novels, if I hadn’t believed in myself then I would never have submitted Without Alice to a publisher.  Whenever I read advice about not believing you’re a good writer because you’ve been told you are by friends and family I think ‘oh what rubbish!’.  If their support helps you to believe in yourself then that can only be a good thing.  Use their support to give you the confidence to get your work professionally edited and then you’ll have the confidence to begin submitting to publishers or agents.

You’re an amazing woman. You’re a mum, you write, work full-time and study, do you ever have any spare time? Erm, no. However, because I’m autistic I’m not terribly social anyway so the time that others might fill with going out socialising is time going spare for me to use on other things.  And as for the studying I just like to say I’m done with that, no more please. Please?  Pretty please? I hate studying!  Don’t tell my boys I said so….

If you weren’t a (fabulous) writer, what would you like to be (when you grow up)? When I grow up I would like to earn a living by writing full time. I’ve got my fluffy dressing gown  ready and waiting.

And, finally, do you in any way know Simon Cowell? All I know is that I’m a Simon Cowell fan; he even gets a mention in The Plump WAGs Club. I do know Goofy though, and he said to say ‘Hi’. Ok that’s a lie….but one of these days it’s going to happen!

Feel free to ask your own question of DJ Kirkby in the comments.

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About the author: I spent my childhood knowing I was different though I didn’t get to prove myself right until I was diagnosed with a form of Autism called Asperger’s Syndrome at the age of 40.  I spent my childhood in the wilds of the Canadian West Coat not realising how very lucky I was to have room to roam and longing to be a grown up so I could do something with my  life.

I developed a passion for reading at  four years old, progressed to writing quirky stories at an early age and  then produced volumes of dire poetry full of teenage angst at just about the age you would expect such behaviour. When the opportunity arose to actually do something different with my life I came to England to pursue the dream and never left. I now have a husband, son and 2 stepsons whom I love with every beat of my heart.  My home is often filled with the sound of laughter as well as two crazy cats, a grumpy tortoise, and loyal friends  who stop by from time to time to make sure I’m not writing anything about them.

I post three times a week on my Chez Aspie blog and waste far too much time on twitter as well as taking a regular romp through facebook.

There’s a very lovely review of Like Bees to Honey and an interview with me over on Catherine Ryan Howard’s website.

There’s me revealing a little bit, over at the fabulous Bah! to Cancer website.

I’m running a competition over on my Facebook page, to win a very limited edition of In Search of Adam.

There’s also a review over at the beautiful One More Page blog.

And you can read my guest post ‘When Being Published Is Not Enough’ over at the CompletelyNovel blog.

(Note to reader: I’ve a copy of ‘Not So Perfect’ to give away and all details can be found at the end of this post)

“22 short short stories; 22 not so perfect lives, where bird watchers come out at night, couples perform love surgery, and a woman is throwing up animals.

The extraordinary is everywhere, but an unsettling familiarity pervades.

Nik Perring’s brilliant debut collection demonstrates the underestimated powers of brevity. Intricately crafted and filled with dark humour, his 22 stories examine the conundrums and contradictions of human relationships, and ask us what it is to be human at all.”

I’ve made no secret of the fact that Nik Perring is my friend. Perhaps I don’t say it enough, but I’m so proud that he is. Nik Perring is an amazing writer. He plays with words, manipulates them into teeny tiny mouthfuls of deliciousness. He is the Willy Wonka of short short stories. He is a word wizard. He is a manipulator of worlds. Like I said, I’m proud. But what makes this friendship almost irrelevant is that I’m not the only person who thinks that Nik is an amazing writer. There are reviews all over the web, there is such a buzz surrounding this, his very brilliant debut.

‘Not So Perfect’ is a beautiful collection. Lost love, abandonment, longing, sex, lust, purity, food, this collection takes the mundane, the everyday and twirls it into a twisted image that will make you coo. Nik Perring is poetic, he is lyrical, he has the power to control a reader’s emotion with the flick of a few words.

‘Not So Perfect’ is an unforgettable assortment of wonky connections that glitter with truthfulness, that spill out ache, that made me nod my head and whisper, yes. I urge you to buy this beautifully quirky small square book.

Asking Nik:

And now for something a little bit different… I have read ‘Not So Perfect’ many times now and in each I have found something new. These are my questions, each relating (in order) to a story in the collection…

1 Which is best teriyaki, hot pot or madras? Teriyaki, without doubt. I actually cook quite a mean Teriyaki. With prawns. Oh yes.

2 What made Paul Hart a good kisser? What makes any good kisser! It’s all in the technique. And, of course, it’s all the opinion of who’s being kissed.

3 Have you ever thought of strawberries when you’ve been frightened? It’s actually a coping mechanism/exercise given to those who suffer from panic attacks. Thinking of something like fruit focuses the mind on something other than being scared. And yes, I probably have!

4 Describe Shark Boy’s notebook and handwriting. I think Shark Boy’s notebook would be functional and smart. Nothing snazzy, just something that works and that can stand up to the rigours of a hard working scientist.

His writing, not that I’ve seen it, (he never had time to stop and show me) would be precise and neat. I think Shark Boy would like to get it right. And getting it right would give him plenty to think about…

5 Have you ever met a Lucy? I’m not sure I have, and if I had she’d have no cause to be cross with me – certainly not to the point where I’d end up singed! I have, however, been shouted at by someone who might not have been all that different…

Actually, I think Lucy’s quite lovely and I would like to meet someone like her.

6 Which pet would you prefer a lemur, a tortoiseshell kitten or a rat? I’d always have said kitten – and seeing the pictures of your new two has definitely confirmed that!

7 Do you have a favourite scarecrow and would you ever blow him/her up? Yes I do. He’s everyone’s favourite scarecrow: the magnificently lovely Worzel Gummidge (we have a lot in common). And I can’t think of anything worse than blowing him up (and that’s including putting him on the bonfire or burying him in the compost heap!).

8 Are you prefect or not so perfect? Definitely Not so perfect. I could be improved on. Greatly.

9 What was the last thing you fixed? Myself a drink, I imagine. I’m not very good at fixing things, to be honest. I’m better at making them up.

10 Which of the Mr Men would you read last? I always liked Mr Bump, so I’d probably save him for the end.

11 What would be your choice of restaurant on a first date? That would depend on what the lady wanted, of course. Japanese perhaps? Or somewhere that does good Thai food.

12 Would you ever give away your heart? Yes. But after last time I’d be very, very, careful about who to.

13 Describe the last bird that you watched. I must admit – I do really like birds and I’m always watching them. The last one I paid any attention to was a nuthatch I’d seen from my office window the other day. Lovely things – kind of like a kingfisher crossed with a badger.

14 What did the telegram from The Other Mr Panossian say? Ha! Well, if there was indeed a telegram I think it might have contained a truth that was not universally acknowledged!

15 What are the pieces that mark the last year of your life? A beautiful square book, a lovely wand, a black pen, a bottle of red ink, a cake, a tea cup, a shaving razor, a hug, and a watch with a rectangular face (which, actually, has stopped).

16 What beer does James drink? I don’t think he’s all that fussy. Cheap lager would be my guess. We’d probably get on.

Though if I knew him I’d probably suggest he tried Cisk; I’ve heard good things…

17 What is Michael’s PIN number? 1981 and I’ve got his verification number too if you want it.

18 Do you use a potato peeler or a knife to peel potatoes? A knife, because I know how to use it! More manly than a peeler too!

19 What is at the bottom of your ‘Things To Do’ list? Relaxing. Having time off. A holiday. Though I know they shouldn’t be.

20 Do you believe in angels? Not the religious kind, no. There are some exceptionally special people out there though and I think they’re as close to angels as you’re likely to get. There are some brill angels in fiction – I especially love the gay ones in The Amber Spyglass and the one in Etgar Keret’s, Hole in the Wall.

21 How do you take your coffee? Actually, I don’t. Tea for me, every time. And then it’s milk and half a sugar, thank you very much. Are you putting the kettle on?

22 How would you spend your last night on Earth? I think I’d like to spend it with someone who wanted to spend it with me. Though I’d be more likely to be found cowering under a table, or trying to clear my inbox!

And Faye at Roast Books has agreed that I can give away a  copy of ‘Not So Perfect: Stories’. All you have to do is leave a ‘please pick me’ comment by 3pm (GMT) June 7, then I’ll pop all names in a mug and ask a small child to select a winner. This competition is open to all.

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About Nik: Nik Perring is a writer, and occasional teacher of writing, from the north west. His short stories have been published widely in places including SmokeLong Quarterly, 3 :AM and Word Riot. Not So Perfect, his debut collection of short, short stories is published by Roast Books on June 2^nd. Nik blogs here and his website’s here.

(Note to reader: I’ve a SIGNED copy of ‘The Bridesmaid Pact’ to give away and all details can be found at the end of this post)

“One for all and all for one…

As children, Sarah, Dorrie, Beth and Caz were inseparable and vowed to one day be each others bridesmaids. But life got complicated. Now they have one last chance to fulfil their promise.

Dorrie is planning her ultimate Disney wedding to the delicious Darren and is determined to have her friends back together for the Big Day. But Dorrie’s fairytale is not all that it seems…

Beth is desperate for a baby and is starting to resent her more fertile friends. Is a mistake from her past about to destroy her future?

Caz’s wild streak has tested her friendships over the years. One by one she has let her friends down, not least when she commits the ultimate betrayal to Susan. Can she change her ways and more to the point, does she really want to?

Married to Steve, Sarah is plagued by doubts that she went down the wrong path. Does Sarah have the strength to make a change and will she ever be able to forgive Caz?

As Dorrie’s big day dawns, all eyes are on whether the ultimate act of friendship will be honoured and obeyed…”

I read this novel in one sitting, as a treat, some ‘just for me’ time. It’s an easy read, a well-written and grounded read (if that makes sense!). The character control is clever, it’s flawless, their voices are each unique. That’s the craft, isn’t it? Seamless joins that a reader requires and takes for granted, yet sometimes we forget to think about the absolute skill and control that is needed by the writer to create both authentic and distinctive characters. Julia Williams has that skill.

I loved ‘The Bridesmaid Pact’. The front cover is gorgeous, the story is original, the writing feels honest and, above all else, it’s a warm and uplifting story of friendship. A perfect summer read, a perfect ‘just for me’ time read!

You can buy ‘The Bridesmaid Pact’ HERE.

I’ve followed Julia Williams online for many years, she has offered me sound writing advice and guidance. I’ve read and loved everything that she’s written. Yesterday we shared a publication date (and in some Waterstone’s we share a table).

SO, because we can, I’m giving away a SIGNED copy of Julia’s brand new and very fabulous ‘The Bridesmaid Pact’ here and Julia will be giving away a SIGNED copy of ‘Like Bees to Honey’ over on her blog. Perfect.

All you have to do is leave a ‘please pick me’ comment by 3pm (GMT) May 31, then I’ll pop all names in a mug and ask a small child to select a winner. This competition is open to all.