Once upon a time, a number of weeks ago, a (golden) ticket arrived from HarperCollins, inviting me to a Summer Party in honour of authors published in 2009. I squealed with delight. The ticket was exquisite.
Fast forward to today and the party is tonight. I have the most perfect dress, I have high high heels, I have a delicious handbag to match, my train is booked. But, (because my life isn’t one big fairytale) something has ‘come up’ in the real world and that something is important.
So, I’m not going to the very posh author party (insert: sad face).
Being a writer, with still young children, sometimes leaves me with identity confusion. I write books, have an agent, am published and have lots of truly exciting things happen to me. But then there’s the other me, who lives in a very real world, where I’m a mum, where I lack common sense and am trying really hard not to screw up the lives of the little ones in my care. My real life is near to ordinary, my writing life sometimes feels like a bizarre dream. The two things shift in and out of focus and finding that balance is truly difficult. I’m sure it’s something that I’ll scramble with until the kiddies grow older (not that I’m in any rush for that to happen).
Today, there isn’t a fairy godmother in my story and there’s nothing else really to be said. It’s just me, sitting here, wearing my writing pants with no makeup on and feeling a little bit sorry for myself.
(That’s allowed, isn’t it?)
{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
I’m so sorry. Children are a total delight and a burden all at once, aren’t they? Long term, I’m sure you’ll feel you’ve done the right thing.
Besides, next year, perhaps another Golden Ticket will arrive?
Twitter: @c_withenayAwwwww, pooey-pants. I’m disappointed for you but 100% sure you’re making the right choice. And there is a Fairy Godmother in your story, she’s busily waving her wand to make something even better happen for you very soon.
Twitter: @tamsyntweetieCatharine – I know I’ve done the right thing, am just feeling a bit sorry for myself during school hours. I’ll have snapped out of it by tonight. And the invite would come next year, if there was a publishing deal…
Tam – if you’ve said it here, on my blog, then it really MUST be true! I’m ok, honest, J needs me today and I need to be here.
xxx
Bugger!
Twitter: @mrkchmbrsWell look on the bright side, at least you get to see even more of Captain Jack tonight!
PS But I’m feeling your pain
(
Twitter: @janettejonesSo sorry we won’t get to meet up in the real world. I know that conflicted feeling all too well. Hope J gets on brilliantly today.xxx
Twitter: @JCCWilliamsPS If it’s any consolation, weather crap and cold here today, so pretty dress might have ended up giving you frost bite (-:
Oh Caroline!
You will be at the party in spirit, but I know that isn’t the same. What you need to do is pick a date, wear your beautiful dress (and very high high heels) and go to see a show or go to a nice dinner.
If you would let me, I’ll be your Fairy Godmother. I’ve done drag once or twice and make a very pretty woman (so I’m told). I’ll even borrow a pair of the husbands shoes he wears for drag. AND I have a magic wand (really I do. It lights up and makes pretty music when you press a button).
I’ll get a pair of wings and fly over to wear you are. I am pretty sure I’ve figured out how to grant wishes (still working on that). What do you say? Do you want me to stand in until your real Fairy Godmother arrives?
You’re allowed to feel sorry for yourself, but only just for a bit. Think of it this way: the party will happen again. But your kids are forever. And you are a beautiful wonderful person who happens to be an incredible mother and an amazing writer.
That has to be some consolation doesn’t it?
HUGGLES GALORE!
Twitter: @jamiesonwolfJamieson
Your doing the right thing!! There will be other parties and J will always remember that you were there when needed
Get a babysitter over the weekend and get lovely husband to take you somewhere posh so that you can wear your frock!!
C x
Twitter: @Mrs_B33bumholes
but I heard it’s going to rain anyway
Twitter: @meganjstaylorand what’s this about finishing a first draft of novel 4 – novel 4!!! That’s a whole other universe altogether (-:
Congratulations to you and your writing pants
xx
Ooooh noooooo – what a shame
I hope the something that comes up isn’t anything upsetting or worrying. There will be more parties – bigger, more glittering ones, with even higher shoes – I just know it xx
Twitter: @explodingauthorOf course it’s allowed (feeling sorry for yourself).
I’m sorry that you’re not able to go to the ball – you must find something to treat yourself with, as some kind of recompense.
On the other hand, if it wasn’t for that pesky “real life” thing, you surely wouldn’t be the rather fabulous writer you are. These things serve to trip one up at times, but I hope you don’t feel too downhearted.
x
It’s definately allowed. I wish I had a fairy godmother to pop over to you and wave her wand. Hope everything is okay soon.
Twitter: @DebsCarrOh, what a disappointment! I’m sorry this had to happen, but I do hope the kids are okay and everything gets sorted with them soon. But I know there will be so many more such parties in your future, and then you’ll be able to go without a care in the world.
Mark – Bugger indeed!
Janette Jones – and what a bright side that is (flash back to Captain J’s bottom).
Julia Williams – that is some consolation and I hope we do meet one day.
Jamieson Wolf – you can be my fairy godmother, as long as you wear your pink shoes. Thanks so much for the lovely comment honey.
Carol – I know and I needed to be there for J. I loved seeing him so happy, after how sad he’s been recently. Husband cooked me my favourite tea tonight – that’s made me feel happy too.
megan – bumholes indeed! And thank you for the congratulations. I am still in shock.
Calistro – I hope so! Though, of course, I’d still need another new outfit.
trousers – Captain J can be my treat tonight! (you are lovely!)
Debs carr – it is, thank you!
Sue Guiney – I know that I’ve done the right thing and yes, one day, hopefully, there’ll be another party.
xxx
Something better will happen. Promise.
*sprinkles fairy dust all around*
Of course it’s allowed, god I do it all the time. I nearly couldn’t go on best friends hen weekend because of Jamie getting nasty rash. But the rash went away. It’s such pants when these things happen. Eat chocolate I say!
Twitter: @ClairererjI’ll always love you Cinders (love Buttons)
Twitter: @hmhuntAwwwwwww Caroline. If it’s any consolation, I should shortly get my hands on In Search of Adam, then Black Boxes…………Hope they’re not TOO dark. Pleased to see you’re up to no.4.
Twitter: @johnwillowsLovely to see all the supportive messages here. Must have cheered you up……a bit
John Harrison
Like everyone else has pretty much said there’ll be plenty more parties and even Your Own which will be way more special.
If it’s any consolation I got the train home and was accompanied by the loud (not riveting) conversation of two authors coming from that very party. One was extremely merry and matched her enthusiasm of her comments by accelerating the volume. She also contradicted herself so much that she couldn’t remember if she liked books or hated certain others. Be glad that this was not you. For you would have been a Lady in heels and more importantly heading in completely the wrong direction.
Kx.
Twitter: @KatieMcCulloughi love cinderlla storyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy